For most people high school must be the best 4 years of their lives. Sure some people go onto college or other things, but high school is a time of dramatic changes and I think most people would remember it that way. For me high school was none of that. For years I blamed it on the school itself but now that 20 years has gone by I can finally admit that it was me along along that caused my high school years to be filled with things that I would like to change.
When I was in 8th grade the pastor from our church came into the classroom to ask us where the students had decided to go to high school, You basically had 4 choices, New Bedford High School, New Bedford Vocational High School, Holy Family High School or Bishop Stang High School. If you wanted to go to any school besides NBHS, you had to take a placement test to get in. I took the test for HF and BS high school because in all honestly I did not want to go to public high school. Was it because I thought I would get a better education at a non public school? No. I choose catholic high school for two reasons: fear and loyalty.
I use the loyalty excuse because my father was a graduate of Bishop Stang himself. He graduated from the 3rd graduating class in 1965 and so he thought I should attend there as well. The fear part of it was a whole different matter. I mentioned before that the church pastor came in to talk to us about where we would be going to school. He walked in the class room as asked us to raise our hands after he named each high school so he could get an idea of who was going to each school. He asked about Bishop Stang and about 9 of us raised our hands. The pastor then stated that this was a good choice and that a small space in heaven was reserved for us. He then asked about NB high school. A few students raised their hands. The pastor shook his head and stated that these few students would find their small space in hell for that. Wow! If that doesn't scare you just a bit into choosing a high school then what does.
I was fortunate that during my freshman year I was able to help out some senior kids with something and they took a liking to me. We weren't friends but they would say hello to me as we passed in the hall or at lunch. Brian Miguel became my best friend and I made others as well. My friends were not the popular group but we didn't care. When it came to girls in school, I was very shy. I had a two year crush on two girls at school, Christine and Sherri. They were part of the popular group and so I dared not approach them. Funny though, during my senior prom, my date very very sick and could not dance but she insisted that I go and have fun with my friends. I was on the dance floor and Sherri came over and told me to dance with her. I thought i was going to have a stroke. it was the best 3 minutes of that prom for me. Even though I had friends come from my grammar school, once we entered high school, they made new friends and we became more distant. One friend I separated from was Diane Lawrence. We would talk and hang out in grammar school but in high school she was friends with the in crowd and again I thought there was no getting in. Some friends just went their own ways and you stop being friends, even though no one did anything wrong. Paul Dutra and Ed Wojnar are two examples. Actually Bruce Alves is another. We just went our own ways and stopped being friends.
Being the shortest kid in grammar school was a disadvantage. being the 2nd shortage is high school was even worse. in high school , all the girls thought Brian Espinola was just the cutest thing. And he was the shortest. Being 2nd shortest got you shit. My freshman guidance counselor, Jim McNamee, tried to set me up with some Senior, that was pretty embarrassing. that probably should have been the red flag that high school was not going to be like I thought it was.
I was not a very good student when it came to academics. Part of the reason was I was not very motivated. I did not go homework the way I should have, I did not study the way I should have. I always had a hard time learning. As an adult I was diagnosed with ADD. As a kid before there was such a thing, i was just labeled lazy and someone who did not pay attention in class. My freshman year i had 5 classes and I got 5 pink slips for low grades. That was a fun thing to bring home for the parents to sign. I did better as the years went on by I was never a A/B student. I was more like a C+ student with an occasional B-. My one saving grace was my sense of humour. I remember one student names Greg Sequin told me he would give me $1 if he could lock me in his locker so when his locker partner arrived he would open it and I would jump out and scare him. Greg gave me a $100 bill my mistake and once he realized it it was a fight for that money. I lost. My senior year Sean O'Hara gave me Ex-lax wrapped in a Hershey candy bar wrapper. I ate the whole thing and then had diarrhea so bad after that I thought I was going to die. He thought it was funny at the time but I think he felt bad later on. His family had a big graduation party at his house and he invited me which, at the time I thought was odd because we really didn't hang out. I went because I knew Sherri was going to be there but I played shy there as well and could not even ask her to dance. It would be another year before I got out of the shyness mold.
So 20 years later what would I have done differently? I would have been more active in school activities. Even though I had no athletic ability I could run fast so maybe I should have tried out for track. Maybe I should have tried out for the school play. I know I should have applied myself more in my studies. My ex wife makes fun of me all the time and tells me how I was not popular in school but I never went to school to be popular. It didn't matter then and it doesn't matter now that I was not in with the in crowd I made some great friends and we all went through the same struggles together. I do think about where some of the students I graduated with are now. I have gone online to see where they are or what they are doing. My 20th reunion is in a few weeks; I wont be going. the 10th year reunion was a disaster. But that is for next time.
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